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Brianna Merk
Mrs.Stoto
Block 5 English 3
20 March 2018
My Modest Proposal
Abortion statistics have risen drastically during the 21st century. Women all over are getting pregnant by mistake by either incest or rape or just by surprise. Who wants to be the mistake child? Abortion might honestly be the best idea birthed. Who wouldn’t want to go to an awesome abortion clinic where they’ll be the center of attention from the minute they put their feet up in those stirrups. Kids are time consuming and expensive, abortion is cheap and quick. Kids could become murderers, theives, prostitues or gang memebers, might as well get rid of them before that happens. Also what about all the kids with disabilities, we don’t want to see them suffer we shouldn’t have to worry about kids bullying them therefore, they should have the chance to leave this earth before even entering it. So, abortion should be glorified because the chances of your child being a degenerate to the society, bullied, or completely drain your bank account are highly likely.
There are so many kids in this world, running around, screaming and taking up space. Everywhere you go there are a lot of kids. Kids are so annoying and loud and disrespectful. The world can only hold so many people and there are way too many already. It’s only common sense to prevent them. They take time and money out of everything and it’s aggravating. We should really be thankful for doctors coming up with the method on how to get rid of them. The average person spends way too much money on themselves in a week let alone a whole lifetime. In fact, once you have the child you spend so much money on them to keep them happy and look cute and what do you get in return? Fits, messes, sleep deprivation, and a constant headache. And then theres child support. On average per month child support costs $430, so per year thats about $5,160. Who has that type of money laying around for a kid you didn’t even want in the first place. Abortion on the other hand is a quick 300 dollars give or take a couple hundred depending on where you go. Couch cusion money. And then you don’t have to worry about spending another dime on the kid for the rest of your life. Plus abortions are about 10-15 minutes versus 18 years maybe more of taking care of another human being that bothers you most of the time. So, lets keep in mind how much time and money you are saving by having a abortion and saving the world from another sticky kid.
Now let’s get into the real world issues here. Since the 1990’s crime rates have gone down, no coincidence that since then abortion rates have gone up! There are still a lot of kids in the world that are unwanted without mothers or fathers why not kill them too before they can become murderers or thieves. And those kids that grow to become gangsters or prostitutes it will lower the population of those things I’m sure. Think about it, the chances of giving birth to a murderer or gang member is likely. Obviously if you raise a kid to have somewhat of a normal brain, in a nice area, not surrounded by crime or violence they should turn out okay but sometimes kids just snap and go crazy. So what’s the point of taking that chance you might as well take them out of their misery before they go to jail and become even more messed up. In your life you pass a few hundred murderers and the chances of shaking hands with a criminal is 1 in 2 and that doesn’t depend on where you live. Before these future criminal masterminds come into this world we have to get rid of them. We can’t have these types of people running around when there was a chance to eliminate their existance to begin with.
Between 1 in 4 kids in the U.S say they’ve been bullied. In one large study 49% of kids between grades 4-12 said they’ve been bullied at some point and 30% said they’ve bullied someone at some point as well. Now imagine having either one of those kids. 8 in 10 disabled kids are bullied. These kids should all be killed before they have to go through that. Disabled kids shouldn’t have to be put through a life of disability and insecurity and then you as the parent have to worry about sending that ball of issues into the real world. No one needs that stress. Even those kids who are really disrespectful kill them too and start anew. Throw them into the ocean, push them off a cliff, or just feed them to the dogs so you won’t have to buy dog food. It would probably be easier too, than trying to teach them late how to do anything. If a kid is giving you an attitude, just kill them and start all over again, just label that kid as being a mistake and it will be just fine. Mistakes that happen every day. Even the government said, “As long as it’s a mistake it’s okay.” Can you say amen to that? Now as humans we don’t have to worry about making a mistake, because we have permission to use our mistakes to our own advantage. Even if it’s another human being, but it’s okay right, it’s a life of not having to worry if your child is being shoved in a dirty toilet face first then getting their lunch money stolen. The money that you are willingly giving them when you could just send them to school with a sandwich baggie full of dirt. So, overall nasty kids or the victim of the disrespect shouldn’t exist and the population of both these wonderful feats of being a kid would certainly go down which is only helping our planet.
All in all humans are always quick to blame someone else. Because obviously it was their fault that their mother was raped, or made a mistake that forced their life on their mom in some way, shape or form, no. Unfortunately it has to be an unborn child that has to take the consequences. Abortion would only help this world out to great extents. All the scum of the earth could be sucked away before even making it here and the kids who would live a life of suffering won’t have to deal with all the mornings of happily skipping off to school to get beat up at recess for being “special”. And think about all the money and time you will save not having that little thing attached to you at all times asking for things and act like a brat in return. Think about all the mornings you would to wake up hearing that buzzing noise coming from 5 feet away and 3 feet down from your eyes. And abortions are fun! Seriously cannot wait for all the hemorrhaging and the uterine contractions. Definitely take lots of pictures to remember every last detail of the whole experience to share my great memories with all of my friends and family. To think those kids that grow up alone without a best friend, that best friend could’ve been the one that was murdered a few minutes ago.

Post Author: admin